I hate the crying I really wish it would stop. It hurts such much. Sometimes I feel like I get hit by a ton of bricks when reality slaps me right in the face. I don't know what i am suppose to do. I just know "THIS" is not right.
I keep thinking something is a certain way and then it hit me.. I am being delusional again.
Change is scary, but I promise, things will get better. First off, (since none of this is your fault) make sure you are given the money to make it, while you find your way. Look at it like an adventure! Who knows, in a few years, you might be surprised how much happier you are..
ReplyDeletePENNY!! OMG, how is it that I'm just finding out about this? I hadn't been to the BA site in ages, and I thought I'd check in, and I saw your post! I am so so sorry!! Oh hon, I know this must be so hard for you, and with two small children. My husband and I just went through a horrible period and almost went down the divorce road, but neither of us was cheating. We just have a LOT of baggage from bad childhoods - and in 20 years of marriage, stuff happens. We are getting through it and getting back on track, but if he had been cheating...
ReplyDeleteYou have to do what is right for YOU! I'm guessing "Penny" has gotten lost in the shuffle in this marriage quite some time ago, and I just know you will find YOU!!
Another book I highly recommend (which was recommended to ME by a friend) is Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers. So empowering and really helpful when you don't know where to turn. It gives you things you can do to feel better in the face of all this fear.
HUGE HUGS!!! Email me if you want to talk!!