I have been on pause for a month. a little bit over a month ago Chris's girl friend came up for a visit and they 'broke' up at the end. I dont' know Chris was moody. Instead of me hounding him with getting out unfuture together I told him I would take some steps back to help him deal with his break up and give him time to think.. The only thing I ask if something changed (with him a slutface) for him to tell me Thats it.. I knew our problems are more then that. A part of me even thought that perhaps Chris was seeing what he was losing and was having second thoughts.. Yes I got my hope up again. I want to stay married. I still do.
I noticed his activity with bitchslutskank face started up agian that they were calling talk txting right back up where they used to. I confronted him over it and he pretty much said very little. Said that he didnt' think anything had changed that they where 'friends' I knew it wasn't going well but decided to try and step back. Mothers day was the big date I had used.
Well I ummm got into his gmail account tonight.. They are back together and Penny gets to look like the fool again. We are going away as a family this weekend and I am still looking forward to it.
Part of me thinks if he keeps things like this away from me I will have a better weekend.. Well fuck you for not respecting me enough to tell me the truth.
My plan is to announce on facebook on Monday ( was going to do Sunday but I realized that its mothers day)
I will post what i write here. I plan to call my mother in law and tell her before I do it. It may seem a bit high drama to post a statement on facebook but honestly I don't want to answer a bunch of questions and deal with people slowly finding out.. This is the best way. I must start to move on.. I can't even face most people right now. I am such a loser and fail
I put an note on chris's computer that he needs ot change his password and i am going to start making my steps to move on.
I am going to have to have some support in trying not to worry to much about Chris's emotional state.
All I can say is if he's back with her and hiding it, he probably got the fear put in him over the thought of you leaving for good. Do what's best for you.
ReplyDeleteI don't know what his motivation is. I know what he wants. he would dream he could have the perfect little family with bitch face on the side. Not even taking into consideration of my own feelings i could never do that to my children. Things like this have a way of coming out and I would rather they didnt' see there mom being treated like a door mat.
ReplyDeleteOh and what hurts the most is He really has hurt our friendship relationship this last time. I put a LOT of trust into him so that i could let him have his space. He broke that. I refuse to allow him to do it again.. I feel about about getting into this email I really do but he won't talk to me.
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